Should You Keep in Touch with Your Ex After a Break Up? Here’s the Truth…

 

 

In my past, I was so guilty of keeping in touch with men I had “chilled” (read blog about that here) or had relationships with.

 

Even though we broke up, I somehow thought it was okay to answer their texts and calls. Even when I would walk through the door of a new relationship, I still had moments where I would entertain their desire to communicate with me.

 

Here’s the problem with that…

Once God has closed a door, leave it closed!

Many of us say that we want a new relationship or husband who is ready to commit and loves God, but are we doing our parts too?

 

When I got serious about my walk with God, I blocked the numbers and facebooks of any man I had ever “chilled” with, had a relationship with, or was attracted to.

Even if I wasn’t attracted to them but they were only attracted to me, I still made sure they had no way to come back into my life.

 

Here’s why…

When I decided to give God my all, I finally realized that the relationships I settled for and men I hung around were only a fraction of what I truly desired. What I really wanted was marriage, a commitment.

Because I didn’t know my worth or who I was in God, I would settle for less without even realizing what I was doing.

I was ready for God to make me a Godly wife that could be ready to support a Godly husband. I knew that if I wanted that life, I was going to have to do my part too.

Now, if the shoe were on the other foot, I knew I wouldn’t want my husband keeping in touch with his exes. I don’t care if it is just a facebook message!

 

I knew that God moves on faith. So, even though I didn’t see marriage right in front of me, I had to start having the faith that God was going to bless me with that life.

This meant I had to start acting like what I wanted to be.

So, even though I wasn’t in the phase of marriage yet, I began to show God that I was preparing for that season. I put my total focus on Him, not men.

So, if I’m trying to show God that I’m marriage material, what good will keeping in touch with someone from my past do?

You don’t need to touch a fire to see if it’s hot! The Bible says that Satan walks about like a like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8).

As Christians, we don’t have time to play games or entertain trapped doors.

Satan is lurking and waiting for an opportunity to get you into his trap. So, when you do get married, do you really want that door from an old flame open?

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You already know that what was in that past relationship or fling is no longer for you. You also know there was an attraction there.

So, if you are praying for God to put you in a better place, why do you keep messing with what used to be?

If you want that Godly husband, show Him you’re preparing to be that Godly wife.

 

The truth is…

Any man from your past who keeps in touch with you is keeping you around as an option. And, to be honest with you, you’re allowing Him to.

He’s still feeling you, but doesn’t want to make the commitment. So, he’s keeping you around ‘just in case.’

 

You’re not an option! To some guy out there, you are the final decision.

But, how can he recognize that about you if you are carrying around extra weight and unnecessary baggage? Let go of your past and block those numbers!

If you found this blog inspirational, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

 

So, what else can you do to deepen your relationship with God as a single woman? ….

The rest of the tips are in my book, I Believe in God, Now What?

Order your own copy for the sale price of $3.00 by clicking here.

 

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Love,

The Truth About Someone Who Breaks Up With You Because of Your Past

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So, you’ve been with your significant other for quite sometime now. You all have fun, finish each other’s sentences, and have phone conversations until 2 am.

Everything is going great. So, you decide you’re comfortable enough to reveal those details about your life that very few people know.

Initially, you’re glad that you decided to be honest with this person, but soon you realize they are beginning to act distant. Before you know it, they’ve broken up with you.

“I never should have told them that,” you tell yourself.

You go on crying for a few days as they ignore your calls and texts. Their actions lead you to believe you’ve done something wrong.

I’m here to tell you that you did not do anything wrong.

Everyone has some wrong they have done. At some point in time in our lives, we have all fallen short of the glory of God.

If you look at my other blogs  you can read about my battles with alcohol, fornication, and lust. Turning a new leaf, the Lord has used me to write about these experiences to be an inspiration to others who struggle with similar issues. Needless to say, my past is out on the Internet for the whole world to see.

Not only does my boyfriend support my blog, but he often helps me with the editing too! He’s not ashamed, he doesn’t beat me up, and not once has he ever thrown any of my past back in my face during a disagreement. He loves me for me, regardless of what I used to do. He values me based upon my worth in Christ and this scripture:

So, no you weren’t wrong to bring up your past with the one you thought you were going to be with. That’s what love does, it’s honest and upfront. Anyone who couldn’t accept that obviously wasn’t ready to love you back. They didn’t realize your worth or the worth of that relationship. They put their pride above everything else, and that’s not your fault.

A few quick tips to remember:

1)Don’t let that situation hinder you from being open again in the future. No one has the right to judge you except for God.

2)Thank them because they kept you from wasting anymore of your time than needed.

3)They have proven they aren’t marriage material. Marriage material realizes that mistakes of the past aren’t worth the relationship itself.

4) Most importantly, FORGIVE them. If you don’t forgive, you will only hurt yourself because you will take old baggage into a new relationship. As Christians, our forgiveness must happen immediately because that’s the same grace that God gives us. The hurt may take time to do away with, but the forgiveness must happen immediately. Give that hurt to God by seeking His Word wholeheartedly. That void can only be healed through Him, not other men or things.

Move on and be happy that they showed you their true colors before you wasted anymore time with them. True love and marriage requires work. That work requires both parties to be in the relationship for the long haul. If that person couldn’t even stay with you because of your past, do you really think they have what it takes to build a future with them?

My book I Believe in God, Now What? reveals my past battles with alcohol abuse, weed addiction, and rape in an effort to help others find forgiveness, love, and healing in Christ. Read more about the book here.  

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Did you find this blog inspirational? Then please share so it can inspire others! You never know someone’s story-your help could save someone’s life. Thanks for your support!

 

Love,

Jordone

Jordonewrites@gmail.com

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Check out my writing about my experience with the Peace Corps Morocco, Africa program.

 

 

My boyfriend and I 

PS-I’m sorry that my blog did not go up this past Friday. I was at a Pinky Promise (abstinence and Godly conference) event that I will be blogging about soon! Love you guys and thank you for your patience.