4 Reasons Why Your Next Boyfriend Should Have a Relationship with God

I used to date these guys who claimed they loved God, but then they would succeed in trying to sleep with me.

It’s no wonder I fell for less than I was worth.

I was only looking at the outer and not the inner.

I was only hearing my date’s words but not paying attention to their actions.

I would hear a man tell me that he got baptized and said the prayer of salvation at 9.

But, I would ignore the fact that his behind had been clubbing, getting drunk, smoking pot, cheating, lying, and cursing ever since then.

A relationship with God goes way beyond getting baptized or saying a few words of prayer at church.

It’s is a daily, intentional walk to obey God everyday, and spend time in His Word and in prayer.

I had to learn that I will only know a man’s love for God according to whether or not he chooses to obey God’s Word.

Thankfully, I’m no longer settling for sex-filled, pot-filled relationships.

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Don’t make the same mistakes I did. Learn from my past. Here are some reasons it’s important that your man knows God:

1. His relationship with God can affect how much you grow in God.
2. His closeness with the Lord will determine the foundation of your relationship together.
3. His habits will become yours. So, you need to be sure his habits reflect a sound knowledge of who God is.
4. That man’s habits will also spill over to your kids, affecting your destiny and your future.

So, before you get into a relationship with someone because they say they “love God,” make sure you’ve taken the time to identify the fruit on their tree.

Be prepared for your next relationship. Click here to start drawing closer to God with my new book

No, you don’t have to judge.

But, you do need to examine someone closely before you assume they know God because they can quote a few scriptures.

I would have never received all the spiritual growth I have now if I had settled for the drama-filled relationships of my past.

I also wouldn’t have moved forward if I was still stuck on my old ways. So, before you go making a list of how ‘holier than thou’ your future husband must be, make sure the fruit on your tree ain’t sour either!

In other words, get yourself right with God first before expecting a Godly man to cross your path. You will only attract what you are. If you need help getting right with God, you can join my get my free “Single Woman’s Devotional.” If this blog inspired you, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

 

So, what else can you do to deepen your relationship with God as a single woman? ….

The rest of the tips are in my book, I Believe in God, Now What?

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Love,

Did God really tell you he was “the one”?

I once went through this “situationship” where I felt like I was forcing a guy to be with me.

I use the term “situationship” because I like to keep it real. It wasn’t a relationship…I was chasing him!

I thought we were going to get married. I thought God told me he was “the one.” I thought we had it made. (Read about that experience here: “4 Ways to Tell He’ll Never Marry You”).

But, it wasn’t love. I was forcing love.

There are lots of women who walk around dating someone because they think it’s who God told them to be with. And, sometimes they are right. Sometimes.

Other times, women unintentionally fabricate the idea that God told them to be with a man because they’re eager to be with someone.

In either case, it’s important to know you should never feel like you are forcing someone to be with you. Or, that you are forced to be with someone else.

God is love. As much as God loves us, He never forces us to love Him back. Love should be given freely. Whenever I obey God in love, it’s because I choose to.

Love is a choice. When Jesus died on the cross for us, His sacrifice was a choice. He had the option to say no. But, out of love for the Father, He obeyed.

What good is love if someone is only loving you out of force?

God doesn’t want you to feel obligated to be with someone. You have to choose your mate beyond the reason of “God told me this person was the one.”

Love is never forced. So, God would never force us to love anyone. He may encourage us in the right direction. But, the choice is still yours to make.

If you only marry someone because you feel God forced you to, you’ll blame God whenever something in the marriage goes wrong.

I’m not encouraging anyone to disobey where they feel God is leading them. But, I am encouraging you to examine your motives.

In other words, whether God has told you someone is “the one” or not, make sure you are with them out of love, not force.

I encourage you to ask God about your motives as it pertains to love, obedience, and anything else He asks of you. Trust Him. Let Him lead the way.

I’m going to post a future blog on how you can know for sure whether God has told you someone is “the one.” Enter your email below to make sure you get the post in your inbox!

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Other blogs on this topic: 

1. Are You Waiting on God for a Man? Or is God Waiting on You? Click Here to Find Out…
2. How Do You Know If He Loves You?
3.  6 Reasons to Let him Go After the First Date
4.  Why Won’t God Send You a Husband?
5. “I Don’t Want a Relationship..Let’s Just Chill”..Here’s the Truth About Statements Like That…

 

 

If this blog inspired you, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

 

 

 

 

 

How to Praise God Through Your Situation

I remember going through a very difficult point in my life.

Times felt so hard and it seemed as if there was no end to my struggles.

I was battling depression, suicidal thoughts, and insecurities.

I was still praying, still reading scriptures, and still going to church.

But, I had let my situation weaken my faith and get the best of me.

My problems had become my god.

One day, I felt like I could take no more. But, I decided to do the opposite of give up.

So, instead of getting discouraged, I just started praising God.

Right there, in the midst of my trial, I told God, “Lord, I abandon myself to you. I give this situation to you. There’s no path I can take that’s greater than what you have for me. I praise you God. You are greater than my struggle.” 

Later on, the Lord led me to this scripture:

“Moreover [let us also be full of joy now!] let us exult and triumph in our troubles and rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that pressure and affliction and hardship produce patient and unswerving endurance.

And endurance (fortitude) develops maturity of character (approved faith and tried integrity). And character [of this sort] produces [the habit of] joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation.” (Romans 5:3-5, Amplified version)

 Look at the bold/underlined words.

In this scripture, God is instructing as to how we gain hope in Him.

Oftentimes we pray, read the Word, and try to believe God’s promises. But, we still find ourselves discouraged, lost, and depressed because we haven’t accomplished the first step: hope.

I can go to church and read 50 scriptures all day, but if my hope is grounded in something else other than God, I won’t believe or act on what I’m reading.

So, if you’re going through a rough time, but you don’t know how to have joy, you have to go back to the first step. You have to let God teach you that He is your joy.

How do you do that?

Well, the scripture says that:

Hardship produces —>>endurance…and endurance produces–>>character…and character produces–>>Hope of eternal salvation, aka: hope in HIM.

It wasn’t just through going to church and praying that I learned to have lasting, peaceful, joy. It was also through my hardship!

Hardship is the beginning process that leads towards hope in God.

Once you learn to trust God through trials, you learn that only He can complete you.

How can you truly understand for yourself that God is greater than your problems until you have a problem to go through?

Three steps towards praising God through your situation:

1) Change your Perspective– If you’re in Christ, God can use your hardship to bring you joy. Think of it as a benefit to your growth in Him.

2) Apply– Take this scripture and apply it to your mindset and life.

3) Don’t Hesitate– As soon as the problem comes, immediately start praising God. Thank Him for all the things He has done.

For a limited time, I’m offering resources about how to grow in God and read His Word. Click here or scroll down to enter your email so I can send you some of my best tips!

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Other blogs on this topic: 

1. How to Read God’s Word
2. How to Spend Time with God
3. 3 Ways to Get What You Want From God
4. 4 Ways to Deepen Your Relationship with God

5 Ways to Wait on God For Your Mate

My single life before God was everything but holy.

 

I was sexing, clubbing, smoking weed, and doing anything else you can imagine to relieve my stress.

 

I called my lifestyle “living the life.” But, I wasn’t living. I was dying.

 

In the midst of my crazy life, I had the nerve to walk around saying I wanted a Godly man.

 

I would go to the clubs, smoke, shack up, and do whatever else I wanted to please my flesh.

 

Then, I would come home at night, pray, and have the nerve to blame God for not having a Godly man in my life.

 

I had nerve- a lot of nerve.

 

Ladies, take it from me: God is not your whore.

 

You can’t treat God however you want and then expect Him to give you your desires.

 

I had to stop taking advantage of God’s grace. I had to stop treating Him like a quick fix by only using Him to feel better about my pain.

 

Just because forgiveness is afforded to me, that doesn’t give me an excuse to keep intentionally sinning, fearing, and not moving forward in obedience.

 

There is a way for you to have God’s peace. But, you can only receive His peace through your obedience.

 

Yes, God may have a Godly man for you. But, you won’t find Him while you’re in the clubs, doubting God, or living however else you want.

 

If you want that Godly man, you’re going to have to be that Godly woman. You’re going to have to develop an actual relationship with God beyond Sunday morning.

 

Here are some steps towards waiting on God for a mate the right way:

1.  Make the Decision –You have to make up in your mind that you’re going to serve God first. Oftentimes, people say they are going to live for God, but their mindsets don’t line up with their words. So, in order to successfully live for God, make sure your mindset is focused on Him. Then, keep it on Him.
2. Trust Him – The key to trusting God is spending time with Him. You wouldn’t trust a stranger with your money or life because you don’t know them. But, you may trust your best friend with your money because you’ve spent time with her. Trust comes with time. The more time you spend with God, the more you know Him. The more you know Him, the easier it becomes to trust Him.
3. Be Intentional- You can’t be lazy if you want to grow in God. You’re going to have to make the effort to be with Him. He already knows who you are, now it’s time for you to get to know Him. But, you won’t know Him unless you put the time and effort in. Get up an hour before work or school to pray and read scriptures. Then, do the same thing at night before bed. Sometimes, you may be led to turn off that TV and pick up your Bible. If you want God, you’re going to have to make the effort. Be intentional about your time with Him.
4. Listen – Learn God’s voice. You’ll learn His voice as you spend more time in His Word. Always obey God immediately without hesitation. If you hesitate, you allow room for the enemy to lead you to disobedience. God’s voice will lead you to cut some people, men, and situations out of your life. Listen to Him. His instructions are a part of His love.
5. Prayer never stops- The Bible instructs us to pray and meditate on the Word throughout the day. Don’t limit your time with God to certain times of the day. Your conversation with Him should never stop. Talk to Him about what you’re doing and thinking. Don’t wonder or worry, pray. Turn your thoughts into prayers and exchange your doubt for scripture. If this blog inspired you, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

For a limited time, I’m offering resources about how to grow in God and read His Word. Click here or scroll down to enter your email so I can send you some of my best tips!

Read more about what I’m sending by clicking here.

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Love,

Jordonewrites@gmail.com

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Other blogs on this topic: 

1) 3 Ways to Get What You Want From God

2) 4 Ways to Tell He’ll Never Marry You

3) Why Won’t God Send You a Husband?

4) “I Don’t Want a Relationship..Let’s Just Chill”..Here’s the Truth About Statements Like That…

5) 4 Reasons Why You’re Still Single

 

 

 

How to Spend Time with God

I’m all to familiar with depression, discouragement, and lack of faith.

God has brought me out of the deepest feelings of sadness, suicidal thoughts, and lack of trust in Him.

How did He deliver me?

Simple.

He delivered me through our time together.

Up until recently, the majority of my life was spent relying on other people’s relationships with God to encourage me.

I can recall getting really excited after someone encouraged me, gave me a prophecy, or delivered an awesome sermon.

But, in a matter of days I was back to my old depressed self. Or, if I wasn’t depressed, I was simply discouraged and battling how to trust God again.

Today, I’m a different person. My trust for God involves a continuous uninterrupted form of peace in my life. Yes, situations still come to knock me down. But, even though my situation hasn’t changed, I’ve changed. I’m a new creature.

How did I change? How did I learn how to stop doubting God permanently?

Simple.

I put the time in.

I stopped relying on sermons for peace. Instead, I learned His character for myself.

Trust comes with time. You wouldn’t trust a stranger with your credit card because you don’t know them.

But, you might trust a good friend with your money because you know who they are. You only know who they are because you’ve spent ample time with them.

God is no different.

You aren’t going to trust Him if you haven’t spent enough time with Him.

Too many of us are going about trusting God the backwards way. We’re expecting too much of ourselves. We’re expecting ourselves to honestly trust God with our money, jobs, families, and everything else when we don’t even know who He is.

We haven’t put the time in.

When you spend enough time with God daily, you know Him. When you know Him-His love, His care, His protection-there’s no way not to trust Him.

So, I want you to spend more time with God. I want you to permanently get rid of discouragement, depression, anxiety, worry, fear, pride, weakness, and confusion.

I want you to stop listening to worldly doctors who say depression and sadness is only curable through medicine. I want you to have the peace God has for you. But, you have a part to play.

You’re going to have to put the time in to know Him. For a limited time, I’m offering resources about how to grow in God and read His Word.

Let’s start now. I’m starting a Jordonewrites Bible study challenge to spend time with God for 27 days straight. If you don’t know how to read God’s Word, read my Bible study tips by clicking here. 

There is no specific start date to join the challenge. You can join anytime! Click here to sign up. Click here to read how the challenge works.

Just a warning- Satan will try to make you too tired, too busy, and too whatever else.

The devil will use your past, negative influences, and anything else to keep you from participating. He wants you to think you’re not worthy to spend time with God. He can only keep you from your destiny if you allow him to. Don’t listen to him.

People make time for what’s important to them. So, your busy schedule is not an excuse. Do what you have to do to get your time in. Some days, I find myself up at 5 am in prayer. If I know I’m really sleepy, I’ll stand up and pray. (I’m not bragging…just giving examples to let you know it is possible).

Here are some tips as to how I spend my personal time with God:

1) Focus-Your mind shouldn’t be on your to-do list or schedule. You should only be focused on God. The Word of God has power. So, if you find yourself extremely distracted or worried, try reading God’s Word first before you pray. The power of His Word may help you to focus in on Him.

2) Prayer– Prayer is not a time where you go tell God what you want. Prayer is a time to find out what He wants. Then, you pray according to His will.

Another purpose of prayer is simply to get to know God better. When you know Him, you can trust Him. As you spend more time with Him, you become more like Him. Lately, my prayer time with God is completely silent. I’m just hanging out with Him without words. I’ll ask Him a question like, “Dad, what do you want to talk about?” Or, “God, what’s on your mind?” Sometimes, He answers. Most times, He doesn’t.

 

But, my silent moments with God are just as important as my talkative moments with Him.

Whether He’s silent or talking, things are happening through our time together simply because I’m in His presence. Words aren’t always needed in your time with God. So, don’t get too hung up on the fact that He’s not speaking back. You might hang out with your best friend for hours, not talk much, but still enjoy her company. God is the same way. Sometimes, He just wants us to enjoy His company. I might sit with Him for hours without Him ever answering back. But, once He leads me to be finished with prayer, I can tell our silent time was affective because I feel the peace and strength of His presence all in me.

3) The Word- After I’ve prayed for at least an hour or so, I’ll put out some scriptures. Read my blog post on how to read God’s Word. 

God may want you to read before you pray. Some days, He may lead you to pray for three, four, or five hours. Other times, you might feel led to turn off the TV or change your plans to be with Him. Be obedient to how He leads you! Spending time with God is such a peaceful, rewarding experience.

That’s it! Those are my tips! Very simple… yet, so life changing.

Please tell all your friends about the Bible study challenge! It’s a great way to make new Godly friends. You can even invite others to do a group Bible study at your home, dorm room, cafe, or campus building. Just make sure each day involves you having your own personal, uninterrupted time with Him. Give God time to speak to you alone.

Studies show that if you make something a habit for a certain period of time, it’ll remain a habit. So, after the 27 days…don’t stop! Keep going! Get all God has for you!

Reach out to me if you have questions!

I encourage you to look at the other blog I wrote on deepening your relationship with God (click here) for an even deeper understanding on spending time with God.

Click here to join the 27 day challenge!

Click here to read how the challenge works.

I’ll be writing other posts on hearing God’s voice so be sure to enter your email below to receive it in your inbox! I love you and I look forward to hearing your testimonies 🙂

 

Want to learn more about how to grow closer to God?…

Then click here to get your copy of I Believe in God, Now What? (ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR 3 DOLLARS ON AMAZON!) Or get the free book sample…

…My FREE book sample, I Believe in God, Now What?, shares my many battles with depression, relationships, sex, rape, and addiction to help deepen your relationship with God. 

This book is sure to answer your questions about your single life and help you move further in your walk with Christ. 

To get the FREE book sample, click one of the following links:

Click here if you’d like to receive the book sample.

Click here if you’d like to receive the book sample plus join the FREE 27 day Bible study challenge (emails sent every weekday morning for 27 days straight).

To get your copy of I Believe in God, Now What? click here (ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR 3 DOLLARS ON AMAZON!).

Love,

Jordonewrites@gmail.com

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Dating Tip 102: Stop Pushing God on Your Boyfriend

I spent too much of my past dating hope.

I had exes who weren’t saved and weren’t living for God. But, I dated them with the “hope” that they would change.

I would think, “Maybe if I invite them to church, they’ll come around.”

I said God could work a miracle out of my exes. But, truthfully my hope wasn’t in God. My hope was in myself.

Ladies, we have got to stop dating hope. 

We have to learn the difference between being patient and lowering our standards.

You aren’t any man’s mother or Savior.

Yes, you should be patient with your future spouse. But, there are certain qualities a Godly man should already have prior to meeting you.

We have to stop playing God in our relationships. We have to stop making an idol out men.

• Only God can:
  • Bring a man to salvation (John 6:44) 
  • Change a man’s heart (Ezekiel 36: 26-27) 
  • Make a man live right (Philipians 2:13)

Every push towards God should be God-ordained, not self-ordained.

When we try to force God on someone, we can actually cause them to not want God at all.

We should always pray for salvation in any man’s life. But, the call towards someone else’s salvation can’t be held on your shoulders.

One of the reasons God urges us not to be “unequally yoked” is because He knows dating a man without God will eventually pull you away from God. You can claim to be pulling him, but his ways are bound to influence you.

In Christian relationships, it’s the man’s responsibility to lead the woman, not the other way around (Ephesians 5:22). If you practice leading him now, you all will only follow that pattern in marriage.

It’s time to let God do the looking for you. It’s time to let God give you a man who is already together. It’s time to stop thinking you can’t do better.

When a Godly man comes your way, you won’t have to play mama or God in his life. Through Christ, that man will have the strength to pull you closer to God.

You can do better. Yes, you do deserve God’s best for your life.

Stop listening to fear.

Fear says, “I won’t be able to find anyone else.”

Faith says, “I have greater faith in God’s will than my own. Whatever He wants, I want.”

Choose faith, not fear. If God is leading you, you aren’t leading the relationship. Trust God. Let Him lead the way. If this blog inspired you, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

 

Want to prepared for your Godly husband and learn more about how to grow closer to God?…

Then click here to get your copy of I Believe in God, Now What? (ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR 3 DOLLARS ON AMAZON!) Or get the free book sample…

…My FREE book sample, I Believe in God, Now What?, shares my many battles with depression, relationships, sex, rape, and addiction to help deepen your relationship with God. 

This book is sure to answer your questions about your single life and help you move further in your walk with Christ. 

To get the FREE book sample, click one of the following links:

Click here if you’d like to receive the book sample.

Click here if you’d like to receive the book sample plus the FREE 27 day daily devotionals (emails sent every weekday morning for 27 days straight).

To get your copy of I Believe in God, Now What? click here (ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR 3 DOLLARS ON AMAZON!).

Love,

Jordonewrites@gmail.com

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How to Read God’s Word

People often ask me,

“How did you overcome rape?”

“How did you overcome depression?”

“How did you learn how to fight temptation?”

Whenever I get a question like this, I always point the answer back to God’s Word.

Don’t let the pictures fool you. I’m nowhere near perfect. If there’s a sin out there, I’ve committed it in my past. Masturbation, drugs, drunkedness, homosexual desires, doubting God–you name it, I’ve done it.

So, from experience I can tell you there’s not one battle you’re experiencing now that God’s Word can’t handle.

But, the key is you have to play your role.

You have a part to play in your own deliverance.

That part includes spending heavy time in the Bible and in prayer.

When I first started getting into God’s Word, I felt like it wasn’t “working” for me.

I was in the midst of so much heartache from the aftermath of getting raped that I wasn’t opening my heart to receive God’s power.

So, the problem wasn’t God’s Word. The problem was me. My focus was on my situation instead of Him.

I feel like there are so many women/men out there who want to dive deeper into God’s Word. But, they feel like the Bible just doesn’t “work,” or is affective, for them. Or, they simply don’t know how to read the Bible.

So, God put it on my heart to share my Bible study tips with you all. I pray these tips change your life like they did for me:

1. Be Open– Like I shared in the example above, you can’t expect to receive from God’s Word if you’re not open to Him. Before you get into your personal time with Him, get your mind off your problems, your to-do list, and circumstances. Part of being open requires you to forgive and obey. Initially, I had a lot of trouble receiving the power of God’s Word because there was so much unforgiveness on my heart. Let go and let God.
2. Ask – It’s good to start your Bible study time out with prayer. Tell God everything that’s on your heart. Tell Him what you want to learn from His Word. Then, ask Him to lead you.
3. Write– Here’s a picture of my journal. Get yourself a personal journal to write scriptures in. There’s something special about actually writing the scripture out. I believe you deepen your understanding of the scripture through writing it out. At the top of the page, write what the scripture is about (forgiveness, faith, love, etc.). That way, you have a point of reference if God leads you to study that area again.
4. Apply– I don’t read the Bible just to read it. I read it to live it. Each day, I take only 1-3 scriptures that pertain to an area God is working on me with. Then, I apply those scriptures to my life. Right now, God is dealing with my humility. So, this morning I picked out some scriptures about humility and put those scriptures into action. Today, a situation came up where I could have been prideful. Instead, I put my morning scriptures into action by practicing humility. God may be dealing with you about forgiveness, fornication, lust, jealousy, or something else. Each day, ask God what He needs you to work on. Then, google scriptures/Bible studies about those areas. Sometimes, God leads me away from googling scriptures. He’ll tell me to simply open my Bible and let Him lead me. Just move according to how God desires. God may lead you to read a whole book in the Bible, but you should still make sure you’re applying other scriptures that actually relate to something you’re experiencing.
5. Meditation – As you read a scripture, don’t read it like a textbook or a novel. Sit, meditate, and ponder on each word. God can give you a revelation about your entire life off of one word in a scripture. So, don’t read fast. Be patient and read slow. As you read, ask God how the scripture applies to your life. Ask Him what He’s thinking about that scripture. Sit and reflect on how that scripture relates to you and how you can use it become a better you. Then, you can write down your reflections in your journal
6. Topical– Sometimes God leads me deeper into the meaning of a word in the Bible. When this happens, I use a topical search. A topical search helps you find out where else a word is located in the Bible so that you can have a deeper understanding of God’s understanding about that word. For example, one time God was dealing with me about love. So, I typed the word “love” into the topical search to find out where else that word is located in the Bible. The search made it easier for me to see what else God had to say about love and how God sees love. You can experiment with the topical search here: http://biblehub.com/topical.

Please don’t let the length of this post overwhelm you!

Reading God’s Word should feel peaceful and fun! Enjoy yourself and get into it!

I think it’s important to get a Bible you can understand. I only recommend the King James and Amplified versions of the Bible because they are closest to the original versions of the Bible. People often find the Amplified version easier to understand. The Amplified is also great because it gives you a deeper understanding of each word in the Bible, making it easier for you to grasp God’s message. Here’s a great version of the Amplified Bible: click here.

If you have any questions, feel free to reach out to me. There’s so much power in the Word! Trust God and His Word will take you to a level of peace you never knew was possible! I encourage you to look at the other blog I wrote on deepening your relationship with God (click here) for a better understanding on how spending time with God. I’ll be writing other posts on how to spend time with God/hear God’s voice so be sure to enter your email below to receive it in your inbox! I love you and I look forward to hearing your testimonies 🙂

For a limited time, I’m offering resources about how to grow in God and read His Word. Click here or scroll down to enter your email so I can send you some of my best tips!

Read more about what I’m sending by clicking here.

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Read more about my book by clicking here. 

Love,

Jordonewrites@gmail.com

Facebook me

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Tweet Me

Other blogs on this topic: 

1. How to Spend Time with God
2. 3 Ways to Get What You Want From God
3. 4 Ways to Deepen Your Relationship with God
4. The Book That Changed My Life: Deepening Your Relationship with God Through Understanding
5. My First Godly Women’s Conference: Pinky Promise 2014…A Life Changing Experience

Dating Tip 101: Shacking Up Before Marriage

I used to live with my ex before my senior year of college.

We did everything together like a married couple: we had sex, bought groceries, paid bills, and played house. We had everything down about married life except the marriage part.

To me, the situation was normal. I had plenty of friends that were playing house, too. Little did I know, my friends were just as lost as I was.

We were all in the same boat: believing in God but not living for Him. We all prayed, went to church, and knew scriptures here and there, but our lives didn’t match up with our words.

Just as much as I was playing house, I was only playing church, too.

My words spoke God, faith, and Jesus, but my actions depicted a heart after my own desires.

Shacking up was just one of the many ways I placed myself in uncompromising positions, making it difficult for God to have all of my heart.

John 9:31 declares that God doesn’t listen to those who aren’t living for Him. So, since my life didn’t reflect Jesus, my prayers and church attendance didn’t matter. Period.

If my life is focused on Jesus, I’m not having sex outside of marriage or placing myself in dangerous situations of temptation. Instead, I’m putting God before myself.

Shacking up was not the will of God for my life nor yours. How can I be focused on not having sex if I’m sleeping next to someone everyone every night? It’s not going to work! You have to either choose God or yourself…it’s just that simple.

Take it from me: if you don’t listen to God now, you will wish you did later.

There are consequences to not handling any situation God’s way. God loves us. His instructions aren’t to hurt us, but to protect us. Unmarried couples living together are more likely to produce unwanted pregnancies and have a host of other problems.

I know that the world, TV, and magazines show shacking up as okay. But, the world also doesn’t have God’s peace. The way towards God’s peace and blessings is through obedience.

Part of obedience is fleeing from Satan. When you flee from Satan, you aren’t putting yourself in situations where obedience to God becomes difficult.

If you want God to bless you with a healthy marriage, a Godly man, and a favored life, you’re going to have to do your part. Receiving all that God has for you is your responsibility. The life He has for you is impossible without obedience to His will. Trust Him and let Him lead the way. If this blog inspired you, please use the share buttons below to inspire someone else.

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Other blogs on this topic: 

1) 6 Reasons to Let him Go After the First Date

2) Why Won’t God Send You a Husband?

3) The Top 5 Reasons Many Christian Women Stay Single

4) “I Don’t Want a Relationship..Let’s Just Chill”..Here’s the Truth About Statements Like That…

5) 4 Reasons God is Better Than Sex

 

 

 

4 Reasons Why You’re Still Single

“When am I going to meet my next boyfriend?”

“When am I going to find my husband?”

“Why is everyone in a relationship except me?”

You are like me if you’ve thought any of the above thoughts.

I have been guilty of worrying about my relationship, my money, my career, and anything else you can think of.

As soon as I conquer one form of worry, it seems as if Satan is ready to find something else to make me worry about.

One of the most difficult worries I had to overcome was my desire for a man. Before God, I would make myself spiritually sick because I was so worried over something that God had already taken care of.

Have you ever realized that your worrisome mindset always leads to insecurities, depression, and negative decision making?

For example, there were times where I would go out on a date worried about whether this guy was “the one.” I would be so worried that I would start getting insecure about my worth.

Because I was in a state of insecurity, I would let my emotions get ahead of me by having pre-martial sex with him. Then, when he didn’t give me the attention I thought he would after sex, I would feel depressed and lonely.

Instead of giving my depression to God, I would become even hungrier for another man to fill my voids. And, the cycle would continue- a cycle that could have been easily avoided if I had never worried.

Ladies, it’s so important that we learn to immediately give our worries to God. Whether you are worried about your future man, your current boo, your bills, the thoughts of others, or your job, worrying will only hinder you from progression.

If you want God to prepare you for a Godly man, you’re going to have to change your mindset, not just your actions.

Imagine if God let you get married in the midst of your confused, worried mindset. You would only take that same type of negative thinking into your marriage.

Because you never gave that worry to God, your bad habit became a part of your character. Now, your husband has to deal with your nagging about the bills, children, and everything else.

Of course, such consistent behavior can easily put any marriage on the rocks. So, now you’re on the brink of a divorce because you didn’t take the time to learn how to stop worrying and trust God before you got married.

Now, you may be able to see why you are still single.

God loves you. He’s not going to let you walk into any relationship or endeavor if you are not ready.

So, if you want to accelerate your growth in the Lord, let’s look at some ways we can avoid worry.

If you aren’t doing the following, your worrying and lack of faith in God’s timing could very well be the reason why you are still single.

1) Immediate separation– Do not let worrisome thoughts sit in your mind for even a second. Immediately separate yourself from that thought. Then, replace that thought with praise. If your thought doesn’t match with Philippians 4:8, don’t think it. If your thinking is aligned with God’s thoughts, you aren’t focused on your bills or when you’ll get a man. You are focused on Him. Do you immediately separate yourself from negativity or do you allow it to dwell on your mind?

2) Believe in God’s timing– So, we all say God’s timing is perfect. But, how many of us actually believe that statement? Acts 1:7 declares that it’s not for us to know when God will bring forth His blessings. So, if you are focused on “when will my man come?”…when this or when that…you are only preparing yourself for worry! Get out of the “when” mindset and get in the God mindset. When you’re totally in Him, the “when’s” become unimportant to you. If you truly believe in God’s timing, then your actions and faith will follow that belief.

3) More time with God– From personal experience, I’ve found that worrisome thoughts are usually a sign that I’m not spending enough time in God’s Word. Don’t limit God to your personal time with Him. Is more of your free time spent scrolling through social media or praying? Pray all throughout the day. Every time you have a free moment, pull out your scriptures on your phone. You’ll only get in what you put in. So, don’t be mad at God about your situation and worrisome thoughts if you refuse to spend more time with Him. You have to do your part.

4) Get God’s Understanding– God’s understanding is an amazing concept that I learned from a book I edited: Understanding: All Success is Attained by It. Whatever God says about your situation is all the understanding you need. God only moves on faith. Have you asked Him about your situation in faith? Or, have you only gone to Him in fear and worry. If you want to know what He thinks, make sure you’ve first done all of the above to get rid of your worry. Then, approach Him in love, not fear, to find out His thoughts. Afterwards, be patient for His reply.

Instead of having faith in your desires, have faith in God’s love. I encourage you to let go of worry and apply the steps above to your life. If you want a God fearing man, show God that you’re preparing to become that God fearing woman too. Then, you can watch His blessings flow according to His will. If this blog inspired you, please share to help someone else 🙂 (other blogs on this topic are below)

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Other blogs on this topic: 

1) 6 Reasons to Let him Go After the First Date

2) Why Won’t God Send You a Husband?

3) The Top 5 Reasons Many Christian Women Stay Single

 

 

How to Know if Your Next Boyfriend Loves You

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Have you ever felt like you had to wonder about whether a guy really loved you?

You may be with a guy for sometime but, although his words express love, his actions don’t.

If this is you, I can relate to your experience. Before my relationship with God, I spent a lot of time thinking love was a feeling. I looked for love in the words and feelings of my boyfriends, instead of their actions.

Today, I understand that love is an action, not a feeling. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that love is something you feel. Love is a verb. Love is what you do, not what you say or how you feel (1 Corinthians 13:4).

I began to understand the true meaning of love as I became acquainted with the Author of Love: God. God is the source and the redeemer of love. So, you can’t have a relationship without God and call it love (1 John 4:8) because He is the core of all love. He is love.

So, when should you tell a guy you love him?

And how do you know if he loves you too?

Look, love is not some fairytale word or romantic feeling. Love is not what you look for in a relationship. Love is what is required for any relationship to operate. So, you shouldn’t even want to be with someone unless you know you love them. When your spouse gets on your nerves, love (patience, kindness, long-suffering) is what you put into effect, not feelings.

So, the question isn’t, how will you know when he loves you? The question is, why would you be with someone unless you knew that he loved you before you entered the relationship?

Before you all entered the relationship, did he show characteristics of love like patience, kindness, and selflessness for you?

You will know if a guy truly loves you through his actions, not his words.

How does he treat you when he’s mad? Does he respect your Godly decision to wait for sex until marriage? How does he act when he doesn’t get his way in life?

It’s easy to confuse fancy charisma with love. Any man can say he loves you, have a great job, put on a nice suit, drive an expensive car, open up the door for you, use great manners, and impress your friends.

Don’t be fooled by outer appearances and resumes. People look at the outer but only God knows the heart.  Let God help you see that man’s heart through his actions, not his words.

Above all else, I encourage you to do a personal Bible study on love. 1 Corinthians 13:4 and 1 John 4:8 are great places to start.

Remember that the greatest love of all has already been given to you through the works of Jesus Christ. Once you get to know Him better, God can trust you to know how to love someone else.

If this blog inspired you, share to inspire someone else.

It’s time to stop settling and start receiving your worth in a relationship. Want to prepared for your Godly husband and learn more about how to grow closer to God?…

Then click here to get your copy of I Believe in God, Now What? (ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME FOR 3 DOLLARS ON AMAZON!) Or get the free book sample…

…My FREE book sample, I Believe in God, Now What?, shares my many battles with depression, relationships, sex, rape, and addiction to help deepen your relationship with God. 

This book is sure to answer your questions about your single life and help you move further in your walk with Christ. 

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Love,

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